Mar 17, 2013

Accept Excepting Expectations

Accept  Excepting Expectations

When we accept another and/ or are accepted by another, we experience happiness. Yet, the duality of our perceptive screens comes along with certain possible occurrences that we need to except in our undertakings. One of them is to expect more. Another is to even have the fear that the other will expect more from us.  To overcome the concept of expectations is thus necessary in any of its forms to reach a state of being happy, together.

So, this fits in well that we need to accept excepting expectations. When two individuals can stick to accept except expectations a thriving relationship can happen. Even if one of the two has a hesitation of making any commitments of any duration, the specific moment when accept except expectations comes true it becomes a moment of total happiness and bliss.

If one can achieve one such moment only then the prospects of moving from this one moment into an ongoing series of such total moments is possible. Without a beginning, there is no journey. So, even if either person has a fear that the other may expect, both of them will have to still accept each other excepting even the fear of being expected from.

If two individuals can graduate to achieving one moment of “Accept except Expectations” Ahha happens. Happiness can thrive only on this seed of ahha... ! Every other state is unhappiness. So it is not enough to not expect, but as important to even overcome the fear of another expecting of us.  

A fear is an anticipation, an expectation of a possible type of future, even if an undesirable one. This brings one to a concluding point, that when happiness is indeed ephemeral and momentary, the willingness to appreciate and live in each moment is the necessary beginning to have a life that can become a journey in happiness.  

Given the fact that the entire body of knowledge that is known and will ever be known is comprehended by our minds through dialectical materialism, it becomes necessary that each person or in other words each soul rises beyond itself and seeks to connect with one other at least, so as the dialectical perception process of two minds can nullify the duality of everything and help both the souls reach states of totality.

To try and do this exercise in establishing, maintaining and retaining a connection with the invisible, unseen, unheard, unsmelt, untasted God is so much more difficult since our mind needs to be silenced to a point where our sensory organs are not pinging our consciousness for even one moment. The challenge gets much more manageable when we can begin to see the presence of God, if we need to feel or reach him, in experiencing the totality of any connect, relationship or interaction with another mind / soul also suffering from dialectical materialism. I have written before too, that it is not possible to determine if the mother made the child the child or the child made the mother the mother. The duality of this universe collapses in such a connection where “Accept except Expectations” can arise providing any soul the opportunity and plank to gauge at this universe with totality. So love, friendship, relationship etc. are ideas that can thus take one to a state of totality and each is thus then a path to experience, feel and acknowledge the divine.  The key then is to Accept except Expectations.  

Long ago, in the early stages of my career fortitude took me before one of the most exceptional achievers in my field. He had often remarked that “One may be smart with situations and sincere with people”. This one thought has so much power that it compelled me to think again and again. Over time, this seed of a powerful idea has transformed for me into, “One may expect from situations and processes but never from people”. This keeps one functional in the material world as well as the spiritual world of relationships. 

As scientists, mathematicians, economists, traders etc. etc. we in any profession have to anticipate the likely outcome and only then choose to undertake one or the other decision. So we cannot be free from expecting a likely course of outcome from the material world to be effective in it. Yet the fact that our soul rides on our body, our spiritual existence rides on this material world. So while one must anticipate the possible outcomes of processes and situations, one must also be willing to let the soul and the spirit behind each action (karma) to Accept Excepting Expectations! 

As Edward de Bono defines mind as a self organizing pattern seeking system, it is to be human then to be finding it difficult to not seek patterns within our perception. The entire spiritual challenge is to overcome our own mind. Until we reach that state, which rare few only do, it is still possible to be truly happy and have so by fulfilling relationships. How? 

Even the focus on meeting and exceeding expectations of the other and not being worried about one's own expectations is just but one variant of Accept except Expectations! It is in giving that we receive better the joys of being human. The dialectical materialism collapses since in giving and finding with each act of exceeding the expectations of the other we are able to manage our own expectations better. If the focus shifts to finding better fulfilment of one's own expectations than in meeting with the expectations of others dialectical perception takes us over destroying joy, happiness and bliss. 

So, focus on giving than receiving, focus on meeting with expectations than expecting and free yourself from the fear of that the other will expect more than expecting a larger joy and happiness. Accord the privelege on the other to be knowing what happiness is as much as you know about it and given that each action has an inducing reaction, a feedback loop and an effect of modifying the perceptions of the other, Accept excepting Expectations. Be happy, truly.